I'm a coward. and not only that a guilt ridden coward at that. so Jo's apparently staying over at James for the night. which means she's not going to come with me to the frat hting. and i'm too much of a coward to go alone. last minute too. *sigh* I'm an idiot. and now i feel guitly. does it really matter to him if I show up? you know, earlier I would have said no. no questions asked. but now. now i'm not sure. it scares me that my presence might actually matter. support. and it scares me even more that by not showing up I may be causing just that little bit of harm to someone. I'd rather endure any kind of pain myself than be the one that has to cause someone else that pain. especially if that someone is a friend. oh god how do I live.